Whether you’re considering one for pleasure or for medical reasons, this guide covers everything you need to know about anal dilators.
What is an anal dilator?
An anal dilator is a tool designed to gently expand the anus.
While designs can vary depending on whether they’re intended for clinical use or sexual enjoyment, most models are smooth and cylindrical.
They’re commonly sold in sets with multiple sizes so you can progress slowly.
We believe pleasure is an essential part of a safe, healthy sex life. That’s why we consult experienced writers, educators, and other specialists to offer their tips on everything from technique to toy selection.
We only endorse items we truly stand behind, so if you spot a link to a specific product or brand, know it’s been carefully vetted — if you catch our drift. Wink.
What are they used for?
As noted, dilators serve both medical and erotic purposes.
Clinically, dilators help stretch the rectum to an optimal size to aid function and comfort after anorectal treatments. This can include recovery from hemorrhoid removal or prostate cancer therapies.
They’re also commonly used to prepare the anus for anal play.
Gradual stretching makes various forms of anal penetration more comfortable, avoiding the pain of jumping straight into larger activities. And by “various forms,” we mean P-in-A sex, strap-on play, butt plugs, gaping, or fisting.
Is using one safe?
Dilators are typically safe when used according to instructions and with proper precautions.
Results don’t happen overnight or last forever; achieving the desired stretch requires time and experimentation.
Patience — and good preparation — are essential when working with dilators.
Does it hurt? What does it feel like?
It can hurt if you’re reckless. But with a careful, unhurried approach, you should only experience mild discomfort as your anus acclimates to penetration.
Inserting anything into the rectum can trigger the sensation of needing to poop.
No need to panic — you won’t accidentally soil yourself. This feeling is a normal reflex from stimulating the nerves and muscles involved in bowel movements.
Are there different kinds of dilators?
Lots of options exist, and which one you pick depends on your purpose and personal taste.
Traditional anal dilators, originally designed for medical use, tend to be straight and smooth. You can use these for sexual prep, but pleasure-focused versions differ slightly.
Often called anal trainers, pleasure-oriented tools come in various shapes. Some have broader tips and some resemble butt plugs, featuring a tapered shaft and flared base.
Price also varies: medical-grade dilator kits can be more expensive than sex-toy-style trainers.
How to choose one
We’re not advising you to overspend, but buying a decent dilator matters.
Whether your dilator is for health reasons or sexual exploration, it’s going inside your body.
Keep these factors in mind while shopping.
Size
If a clinician recommended dilators, they likely suggested a size range.
Otherwise, the usual advice is to begin with the smallest size available and increase gradually.
Don’t be tempted to start larger — that risks causing a real tear.
Most kits, like this set from VuVatech, begin at about 0.5 inches in diameter, a sensible starting point for many.
Length doesn’t matter much for dilation, but ensure the item has a flared base. Never insert something without a flared base; it could become stuck and require medical attention.
Material
Not all materials are safe for delicate anatomy, so pay attention to what the dilator is made from.
Choose devices crafted from body-safe substances like medical-grade silicone, free of phthalates and BPA.
Common material choices include:
- silicone
- polycarbonate
- stainless steel
If you’re new to anal play or experience rectal sensitivity, silicone is softer and more flexible than alternatives.
It also warms to body temperature faster, offering greater comfort.
Examples across materials:
- VuVatech Polycarbonate Magnetic Dilators
- Rouge Hegar Stainless Steel Dilator 8-Piece Set
- Doc Johnson Crystal Jellies Anal Initiation Kit
Weight
Weight matters less for straight dilators than it does for plugs.
Butt plugs are intended to remain in place, and their heavier feel helps them stay put.
This reduces the chance of them slipping out if you bear down, which is a natural reflex when something’s inside.
If you prefer the plug approach while stretching, consider these starter kits:
How should you prepare?
Absolutely yes — preparation matters a lot.
Getting ready can make or break your experience and protect your anus.
Use these prep tips before a dilation session.
Have a bowel movement if possible
Stool can be higher in the rectum, but inserting a dilator may trigger the urge to poop. That worry can make you tense, so try to empty your bowels first to ease both nerves and your hole.
Pick the right moment
Anal dilation shouldn’t be hurried. Choose a time when you can relax and take things slowly without interruptions.
Relax first
Relaxing the anus requires relaxed muscles and mind. Take a warm bath or practice deep breathing before you begin. If your aim is pleasure, some solo play beforehand can help.
Use plenty of lubricant
Lube is essential to ease insertion and prevent tears. Apply ample lubricant to the dilator tip and around your anal opening.
Silicone lubricants, like this Überlube, are ideal for anal play because they’re thick and long-lasting.
If using a silicone dilator, opt for a water-based lubricant like #LubeLife, since silicone lube can degrade silicone toys. Remember: silicone degrades silicone.
Choose a comfortable position
Find a position that lets you — or your partner — insert in a straight line. Solo users may prefer lying on their back or side, while partner-assisted play often works best with the receiver on all fours.
How do you actually use a dilator?
With care. Here are step-by-step details.
Insertion
Go slow, use lots of lube, and be deliberate.
Once you’ve lubricated your dilator and anal opening, get into a comfortable position.
Then:
- Gently place the dilator’s tip against your anus with light pressure.
- Breathe deeply and apply a little more pressure as you exhale.
- Insert slowly, aiming for about an inch or so over the course of 3–4 minutes.
- If you feel resistance — which is normal — withdraw gently, re-lubricate, and try again.
- If insertion is easy, you can repeat the process with the next size up in your kit.
While it’s inserted
What you do while it’s inside depends on your goals and comfort.
If your sole aim is dilation, there’s no need to keep it in once you’ve achieved full insertion.
If you’re seeking pleasure, gentle in-and-out or circular motions can feel good.
If you’re using a butt plug, you might leave it in for several minutes to enjoy the fullness or combine it with clitoral stimulation, manual play, oral, or other erogenous touches.
Removal
Take it out slowly and steadily. Try to keep the dilator aligned with your rectum as you pull it out gently.
What if something goes wrong?
If you’re new to this, you’ll likely worry about “what ifs.” Here’s how to handle common scenarios.
If there’s stool:
This is normal. Clean the dilator, wash your hands thoroughly, and try again.
If you have a bowel movement, wash yourself, the dilator, and any soiled surfaces well.
You can try again once your bowels are clear.
If it hurts:
Minor discomfort is expected, but significant pain means stop, slowly withdraw, and retry later.
Next time, use more lubricant, try a different position, or use a smaller size.
If there’s bleeding:
Try to stay calm. Stop, remove the dilator gently, and check the area in a mirror.
Light spotting that stops quickly is usually not serious.
Seek medical care if bleeding is heavy, continues beyond a few minutes, or is coupled with severe pain.
Aftercare and cleaning
Your rectum houses many bacteria, so thorough cleaning after any anal contact is important to prevent infection.
Clean the dilator according to the manufacturer’s instructions or wash it with fragrance-free soap and warm water.
Shower to clean yourself gently afterward.
A warm bath afterward can ease tension and soreness.
Adding a cup of Epsom salts to the bath may help with any lingering soreness.
How often should you use a dilator?
If a physician prescribed dilation, follow their schedule and raise any concerns with them.
Otherwise, aim to use it three to four times a week for one to two weeks before moving up a size.
Listen to your body: only increase size once there’s no pain or resistance.
Final thoughts
Whatever your reason for using a dilator, take your time and tune into your body.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.